Rae Roy

Thanks for joining me! Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton There are a lot of changes going on. I struggled for a long time to figure out what to do. I wanted a business that encompasses everything I do rather than have multiple businesses. I didn't want to deal with the taxes, nor the administration of a site for each endeavor I undertake. Thus, The Write Buttons is born. I'm a writer and a sewer. I also dabble in music and have plans for that eventually. Tiny Samurai isn't going away, it's just taking on a new form. I've purchased my new domain name for 88 cents tonight! I'm just waiting for it to flip to active. One thing? I've been scared of the logistics involved in shipping items. Other than the name issue, I had been letting this hold me back. Well, no more! It's time I just jump in and see where I end up. On the writing front, I'm working on a short documentary. It's taking up a lot...

Today was a fantastic day. I was productive right from the moment I opened my eyes. I basically merged data from two apps on my phone, so I could get rid of one of them. Then I worked hard all day. I also heard some potentially good news on the job front depending on how some decisions are made. At home after, I got some laundry done, made tasty Instant Pot ribs with a homemade bbq sauce, and dug out the Christmas tree from storage. I got to spend time with my boyfriend. I even paid some bills. I’m feeling really fortunate for what I have and the things I’m privileged to be a part of right now. Shout out to all those who have been there for me lately. You all rock! R~

I was going to post something utterly different, but I just found out about Stan Lee and I can’t put any more words together right now. R.I.P. Stan Lee. You were an amazing creator and human. I hope you find Robin, Alan, and Chester. I feel like someone has stabbed me in the heart. R~

There is a lot of stuff happening right now and I have no idea where any of it is headed, but I’m choosing to be positive and thankful that there is so much potential in my life right now. I’d write a lengthier post on the subject, but it’s National Novel Writing Month and I have a story to write! For NaNo, I’m working on The Blood Waitress Club. Right now I’m trying to figure out where I’ve left off as I started it a couple of years ago. I’m loving getting reacquainted with it ❤ R~

Sometimes short weeks feel longer than regular ones. The first time I heard that, I shrugged it off in disbelief. But this week, I feel it. I think the phenomenon can be best described as Vacation Brain. It's where your thoughts continually drift toward weekend plans. This is often experienced on Friday afternoon during regular weeks, but seems to happen for much of the day before a getaway. Productivity becomes as slow as the clock, whose seconds seem like hours. I have a busy weekend ahead including a wedding and a family visit. They are in two different cities. I have some things to do yet like laundry and packing, but now that it's finally the evening, my heart's into cuddling and watching a movie. I figure I can manage a bit of play time in with the responsibilities. Laundry mainly washes itself... A few other things to do before leaving town like an oil change. It seems there's always something. I think I'm getting very close to being caught up though. Pretty ...

It's a new month, so some goal tweaking and other changes are in store. 1. Reducing Facebook use: The app has been sucking up too much of my time, so I've disabled it on my phone. I'm keeping messenger, but I'll only use Facebook sparingly going forward. 2. The Page & The Magician : I'm targeting the end of this month to have my edits complete on it. 3. Movie logging: I'm moving away from keeping an album on Facebook related to my movie watching and switching to Letterboxd. I was using Letterboxd earlier this year and stopped for no real reason. I think it'll generally be less maintenance and I can connect it to Facebook anyway. 4. NaNoWriMo Prep: I'll also be taking some time to get ready for National Novel Writing Month. I plan to add as many words as possible to The Blood Waitress Club in November. That's it for now. I'm hoping some allergy medicine kicks in soon as I've got an allergic rash that's making it hard to fall asleep. I ...

So, I'm walking around Sparks Street searching for my boyfriend, who doesn't have a phone. Yeah, he's old school. Anyway, I'm searching for him because he's not at the meeting place we picked earlier today. He's late. And not a little late. He should've been there more than an hour ago. I'm getting worried and also maybe getting ready to get mad at him as I'm thinking maybe he took off. Anyway, I'm walking around and run into this older woman. She makes a comment about the being too many illegals. I'm thinking she's talking about refugees and give her a strange look. She then says that no one respects stop lights anymore and just walk illegally. These illegals are everywhere. The term she should've been using was jaywalkers. I figure she'll get herself into trouble someday with that, but I continued on my way. I had to give up looking for the boyfriend and contact his family. He eventually strolls into the bar we were going to aft...

Today turned out different than I hoped. Normally, I would have been at work, but the tornado reeked havoc across the city and anyone who could was instructed to work from home. I also had an appointment regarding an old loan that didn't go the way I had hoped. Looks like my credit rating has gone down since July and my next step is to figure out if it's on the mend or if there's something I'm not aware of as it takes a bit of time for the things to be rectified. I have faith it will be okay soon, one way or another. My mortgage is up for renewal this year, so I'll be able to have some negotiation room there. At least, that's what I was told. I am fortunate to live in an area that wasn't affected by the tornado. I didn't even lose power! I got some editing done this weekend. There are six chapters left to go through before I send The Page & The Magician back out. I'm not sure I was truly ready to finish it before now. I feel like my writing has i...

I'm reading Terry Prachett's Soul Music and there have been a number of times I was annoyed while reading it. So annoyed that I almost abandoned it. Why? A few things. At times, I've noticed it's written by an old white guy. Now, I'm not an uber feminist, but in it he tends to make jabs at youth being clueless and other such things that make it really evident. There are also footnotes that I've found pull me out of the story, so I had to ignore them to move forward, which means I'm missing a bit of the story in order to enjoy the story and that seems silly. As I read further, I realized he made fun of everything. There's even a subtle jab at Michael Jackson's musicianship that is both a jab and yet not at the same time. He says a lot through subtext. There is so much of the book that is true to life that one might not be able to fully understand depending on their life experience. Had I read it 10 years ago, I think I would've missed much. I want...

Fall marks a return for many to school, to a regular work schedule, and to the activities enjoyed in cooler weather. For me, that means it's back to martial arts and to a more rigorous and disciplined writing schedule. It was nice to see my writer's group tonight. We talked about how everyone's summers went and what their goals for the year are including what each of us might work on during National Novel Writing Month in November. One of the things we often ponder and discuss is how best to support each other, because that is a key reason for bothering with a writer's group. Not that it's the only reason, but it does help define group direction. There are all sorts of writing groups. Some push each other to reach their goals. Some just read and offer feedback. Some just get together to be around other humans. Many writers find just having regular contact with other writers can be helpful for inspiration and for touching base with other people who get it. Get what? ...

I've been off enjoying the summer. I recently started watching a documentary on the keys to mastery. It includes interviews with musicians and actors such as Carlos Santana and Stephen Tobolowsky. In the early part of the documentary, they talk about the first key being finding the thing you love. I don't know about you, but I've heard something along these lines time and again. What haven't I heard much? How to figure out what you love. In the documentary, they say that many people never do. They die without figuring out their true purpose in existing. How sad is that?! I can't think of anything sadder, so I thought I would explore that angle and offer some suggestions I've gathered from talking to people and from my own experiences. Try a lot of things. You may have heard this advice before. When I was newly separated six years ago and slightly before that, the reality was that I didn't even know myself anymore. I didn't know what I wanted out of...

A man went on Georgia's Got Talent and gave the entire room an experience they're not likely to soon forget. Watch it here . Happy Labour Day Weekend! R~  

*Someone* likes sending naughty messages and making it difficult for me to concentrate on work. Every. Damn. Day. I suppose I've suggested people do this to their significant others on numerous occasions, so I'm simply getting a taste of my own medicine, right? T.G.I.F. I'm not sure what's in store this weekend, but looking forward to it. Maybe a concert or several movies and cuddling. Hopefully some writing :) Have a great weekend! R~

Lately, I'm going with the flow. It takes a little extra work to achieve goals while doing so, but I think it may be good for me. Instead of making everything I do into a big deal, I simplify it. As far as decluttering goes, this means that I gradually gather a few items and leave them by the door. When I'm ready to go out somewhere, I put them in the car and just slot the drop off into the rest of my plans. This way it's not a giant all day event and I get to feel a little less burdened by excess. Some may prefer getting it all done in one day, but I find it exhausting and a system shock. In writing terms, I mostly let rejection roll off of me. I acknowledge it enough to think about whether or not I need to improve a specific skill, but I don't get upset that I didn't make it into an anthology. In fact, I may think about creating my own anthology instead. If so, it will likely be electronic only since they typically don't sell as well as other books do. Of cour...

[caption id="attachment_10523" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] I haven't dropped off the planet. I've been quite busy between a new job and trying to get my place fixed up. I also have a new man in my life who's weird in all the right ways. He's romantic and treats me really well. I'm sure I'll eventually post about it in more detail, but for right now I'm savouring the time we spend together and wanting to keep him to myself a bit ;) So as the heat of summer is slowing dying down, a fire is spreading in my life. These flames are far from the destructive forces plaguing Northern Ontario. What can I say, except that I've never been one to follow a trend. Hope you have a good weekend. I'm pretty sure I will ;) R~

[caption id="attachment_11040" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] There is a lot of change going on in my life recently. Not only have I started a new job, but I've started teaching my first student with the blessing of my sensei. I didn't go searching for it; it found me. Teaching is interesting. Right now, I feel like I'm just trying to figure out what works best for this student. But it challenges me in a way that other training doesn't. I have to try to remember what it was like when everything was new for me. I don't believe in a one-size fits all approach. Each student has different challenges. I have trouble with my posture from playing roller derby and problems with my ankles too. I also need more frequent water breaks than most people. Some are dealing with different injuries. Others have trouble focusing. Vision, hearing, spatial, and many more things can make the journey different for someo...

Today I rejoined the office worker lifestyle. It has been two years since I last worked for someone else, so it was quite a big day for me. First days are often a mixed bag emotionally. Things I felt today: 1. Anxiety: No matter how much I tried to prepare yesterday, there was always something this morning of that didn't go the way it should. 2. Eagerness: I was ready and raring to jump in and get things done. 3. Frustration: Some things weren't quite set up for me yet, so I couldn't do all the things that are part of my role. That's a typical first day thing. 4. Tiredness: I tried taking a brief nap after work, but no go. It's always a challenge to switch from the #writer schedule to a regular one... 5. Happy: The people were really nice and I'm grateful to be part of a wonderful group of people. 6. Sore: I have a little blister on my one heel, but thankfully I was smart enough to pack large bandaids, so it's not nearly as bad as it could be. 7. Relief: It...

[caption id="attachment_10523" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] So I didn't know what to write about today. I've been a little busy to think about sex at all. Then I came across this article about a man who tricked women into having sex with him. The catch? He doesn't have a penis. You might be wondering how they didn't notice. Well, he never let them see him naked. They always did in in the dark and otherwise they could only touch him with his clothes on. And he used objects to penetrate them. The objects weren't comfortable for the women most times. They said it hurt to have sex with them and just figured he didn't know what he was doing. As you might expect, he's now on the Sex Offender Registry. Why? Because they consented to having sex, not penetration with an object. Anyway, I'm thinking things could've gone so differently. Instead of outright lying like that, he could've g...

[caption id="attachment_11040" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] Natsu Matsuri 2018 It was a soggy day, so the event was moved inside this year. Though it was a little more cozy in the smaller space, it was a success. My dojo was the opening group of performers and I was leading my portion, which was scary. I can't recall if I ever heard my sword, or if my heart was simply beating too loud to hear it. Because we were first up, I got to relax and enjoy most of the day. The booming drums of Oto-wa Taiko were even more amazing than usual. The dancing was more difficult to participate in as it became very challenging to figure out who actually knew the dance you were supposed to follow along with. I didn't buy much for food as most items had ingredients I couldn't have or all Japanese labels where I couldn't tell what I might be eating. Training in July I always struggle with martial arts in July. It gets to...

I missed Shark Week :'( Well, maybe not entirely if my B-Movie Club goes with something shark related... Okay, so I failed on that, but other things are progressing nicely. I've been boxing up my books and I'm going through the worst of the declutter effort right now. I decided all my books will live in my living room except those I'm actively reading. This is going to clean up my bedroom and let me repurpose the bookshelves in there for my music related goals and equipment. As soon as I can afford to, I plan to get two nicer all wood book shelves for the living room. They'll be tall and on the narrow side. I'm basically cleaning my whole condo out at one time. It's a lot. Some days I feel overwhelmed. Mostly, each step brings me closer to what I want. I've reached page 10 on my second feature. I'm planning to tweak my first one then send it out to someone I know. I got some ideas about my novel recently, so I'm glad I'm not quite through the...

[caption id="attachment_11040" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] I'm taking a self-directed literary course to improve a certain aspect of my writing. It brings up the continual battle between writers who want to portray the world realistically as it currently is versus writers who want to portray the world as they would like it to be. This has been going on for more than a century actually. It's an idea that I think bleeds into everything else. It may even be one of the reasons why so many are quick to believe fake news over scary truths. In terms of martial arts, the battle is often between those who practice more theoretical arts versus those who practice more sport style with competitions that regularly test your mettle, though not as they would have hundreds of years ago. In the old days, death was a common outcome for the weaker party. Many of the writers I know hope to change the world by writing it as it...

I watched one of those 60-second documentaries on Facebook today during a writing break. It was about a 77-year-old ballet dancer named Mrs. Poole. She talked about how ballet isn't easy, but has to look it. It takes a lot of discipline and it's a lovely feeling to work hard, but enjoy it. Gee, what else have I heard this about? Writing? Yep. Martial arts? Yep! Music? For sure. It's almost like everything worthwhile in life requires hard work or something. I'm reading Ed Sheeran's book right now where he says he grew up with virtually no TV or video games and devoted his time to learning the guitar. He sucked at school, but he and his dad went to tons of concerts and he listened to a lot of different artists. He was terrified to do his first ever performance, but it went well, so that encouraged him to continue. Had it went bad, I guess we wouldn't have Ed to listen to now? It seems like everyone who gets anywhere has to put a lot of work in and has to sacrifice...

[caption id="attachment_10523" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] It's Friday the 13th. I can't remember if I ever saw the first Friday the 13th movie before or not. So far it seems more about making out and sex than it does about the slasher. Bum grabs, moaning... Older movies are always fun because you get to see how much things have changed and how much they haven't. To me, it seems the sex is less graphic, but more passionate. I've seen way more funny sex scenes in horror films as of late than I have seen serious ones. Oh, there's the killing. It was just a semi-slow build up. In Friday the 13th (1980), it really pulls you in the different directions. One minute it's a fairly steamy moment and the next it's horrifying and bloody. I'm off to enjoy this classic horror film. Have a good weekend! R~

[caption id="attachment_11040" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] My life is in a hurry up and wait stage. I'm waiting on my debit card for my personal bank account to come. It seems I can't deposit my HST credit cheque into it until it's here. I have a meeting later today about my self-employment related account, so at least I'll hopefully be able to get some other things moving. I have to go to a different branch because the one I was supposed to go to is having server issues today. Of course. This is my life right now. At least the other location isn't far. When I started writing this post last night, I was also waiting to hear the next step for work. A couple of days ago, I had been told there was some sort of form to fill out, but I hadn't received it yet. This morning I found the link to put in my details for a background check. It was a little longer for me to fill out because I have severa...

I've had a rough time lately. That job turned out to be fake. I lost money I couldn't afford. My fears of losing my home and ending up homeless became an even bigger reality. Luckily, I got another real job that will be starting in a couple of weeks! In the meantime, the experience has encouraged me to put some things in motion, like furthering my decluttering efforts. What I realized is that it was silly I was waiting so long to do some things like setting up an online store for my books. My goals are going to change slightly now that I've been through this experience. 1. Finances - Acquire two new chequing accounts that come with free savings accounts. - Pay off my credit card. - Pay off the remaining amount of the fake cheque. - Pay off the last bit of my car loan. - Pay off my student loan - Continue doing self-employment activities on the side. 2. Home - New writing space in my living room. - Finish painting the living room. - Musical instruments moved to my bedroom wh...

[caption id="attachment_10523" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] Well, it takes a bit of strength to last through all the B.S. I've faced this week, but I'm in much better spirits. Perhaps I'll elaborate on that next week. Friends who read this, know what has been up. Anyway, suffice it to say I had a lot of things to deal with because the job turned out to be a scam. But there is a silver lining because a real job is happening soon. Lasting power is something usually men are worried about, at least if movies and TV are to be believed. This may be a newsflash, but I've heard some women say they arrive long before their male partner. This tends to happen more as men age. I even know some men who have difficulty arriving at all as they get older. Not intimately, just at a conversational level. Why is it a big deal? Well, many people seem to feel like if they don't ensure their partner gets there relati...

[caption id="attachment_11040" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] Life has been a battlefield for me for quite some time. I thought things would be good after my divorce and moving to a new city for a good job. And it was. For a time. Until I was laid off and my position, along with a chunk of my department, was abolished. So, I riskily spent my remaining assets on the parts of a graduate studies certificate in Scriptwriting because there was at least partially free tuition and I was hating my work. I didn't feel bad making use of the free tuition as I had been paying taxes for nearly 20 years. Why Scriptwriting? Well, I already know how to write novels and while I could be better at short stories, I've at least gotten a couple of those published. Movies are a love of mine and it seemed hard to teach myself the basics, plus there was the benefit of making industry connections. But since school ended in April, I...

Today is Canada Day! It's a pretty special day around here and though I don't usually post on Sundays, I am. But it isn't just the fact that it's Canada Day that made me want to post. I read an article where my friend was interviewed and that is what moved me. It's an article about Canada as an ideal vs the reality for many indigenous people . I've always been aware of some people disliking natives, but I've never understood it . Maybe it's because my own family would've been pretty screwed without them. I don't know the circumstances behind my own family living on a reserve when my mother was born over 70 years ago. It upsets me that I don't know. There are pieces of our history that have been scrubbed away. My mother was raised by her grandmother and her step grandfather after her real grandfather passed away. Her grandfather was from Scotland and her grandmother from Sweden. She was also raised by her mother, but believed her mother to be ...

[caption id="attachment_10523" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] For a sweet summertime treat, make Sex in a Pan. It's no bake. Here's a recipe from Chocolate Covered Katie . I'd probably sub either shredded coconut or quinoa flakes for the oatmeal because oatmeal and me don't get along well. Daiya cream cheese may be easier to find for the dairy sensitive among you. I really don't see the need for raisins and I'd rather put some raspberries on top instead. I'd probably use So Delicious Coconut Whipped Cream and Belsoy Dark Chocolate Pudding. I think some people even sub graham crackers for the crust instead of nuts, which come in gluten free, but then it's practically chocolate cheesecake... Happy Canada Day weekend! R~

[caption id="attachment_11040" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] 1. Music Pan Flute : This music always makes me think of martial arts films. Maybe I'm just weird because it also makes me think of Chinese buffets like The Mandarin. There are probably a few with that same name, but I went to a huge one in Ontario years ago and it's that specific one. It can be quite relaxing . 2. Film Jackie Chan : Of course Jackie Chan has used a pan as a weapon in his films. I've seen him use bamboo chutes, ladders, and many other household items, so I wasn't surprised by this. 3. Legendary Martial Artist Pan Qingfu : Grandmaster Pan was the man with the iron fist. He attained legendary status by age 30 having become proficient in over 20 styles of kung fu and studied with 15 masters of Chinese fighting arts. Pan Qingfu was one of China's most respected martial artists. He was adept at knocking his opponents out an...

Umm, so I picked the topics for my blog out months ago. This week happens to be Pan. I didn't look at the topics until just now and it's freaking me out because today I worked on a movie set as a background actress where they had cameras panning. I don't really have any other updates related to panning except that I've been trying to do some background acting work for years now, so I'm happy it finally happened. I spoke to someone in another city who seems interested in my skills if the other job doesn't come through. That's all I have. I've been struggling to catch up on sleep for a couple of days now. Feels like I need to practice a little self-care. Then I'll get back at everything. R~

[caption id="attachment_10523" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] You don't have to head off to a hedonist resort to feel sexually free. For some, a resort may be paradise and for others it may be terrifying. Sexual freedom to me means feeling good in your own skin and being focused on having fun with someone instead of worrying about something like whether or not your legs are perfectly shaved or if your partner will think badly of you if you want them to explore options like fuzzy handcuffs or whipped cream. It can take time to be comfortable like that and some people never get there. So many marriages end because one partner felt they couldn't talk to the other about trying new things. And I don't think that is limited to sex. If you're fighting over which garbage can to purchase, can you feel comfortable discussing heavier topics like depression? Like sexual fantasies? Let's face it, there are a l...

[caption id="attachment_11040" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] It's really hard to feel free when you're in the position I am right now. I suppose I have some options, but many of them have things to weigh carefully. Financially, I need to make a serious change if I don't get a regular job soon. I'm at risk of losing my home. It's not that I don't have desirable skills. There is one particular skill that is making it difficult for me. Which one? I don't speak enough French. I'm learning it, but I mostly know basic etiquette and swears. One of those is helpful for work. I'm waiting to hear on the results of a job interview. Options if I don't get the job: Drive Uber: I'm already delivering food through them, but delivering people makes more money. There are drawbacks. One being that I don't love driving enough to make it my main career. The increase in car maintenance ...

It's hard to feel free when you're in dire need of employment and worried about losing your home. When nearly every moment is occupied with job hunting and applications and you'd like to be doing almost anything else. These weeks have been exhausting and I haven't gotten as much writing done as I'd like to. I now understand why the working poor doesn't chase their dreams. They're too busy fighting to survive. But many a self-made millionaire started there. I had a job interview today! It felt like it went well, but who knows? They could've been more impressed with someone else. I feel good about it anyway. I think it was one of my better interviews. I should hear this week. Cross your fingers, pray, or whatever you'd like for me please and thank you! Hopefully the tide is changing in my favour. I could really use the kind of break that is a bunch of work. I'm making a lot of progress in cleaning my home thanks to having a friend stay over this we...

[caption id="attachment_10523" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] Gosh one can go in a lot of different directions when talking about sex and sitting. For decades, babysitters invited their boyfriends over once the child they were hired to watch was gone to bed. Some didn't even wait for that. But I'm not in that world, so I don't know if it still happens. Are teens even capable of looking after kids now? Are they even allowed? I've heard of parents getting in trouble for having their twelve year olds look after younger children. It boggles my mind because that was a normal legal babysitting age when I was younger. It seems fourteen may be the age now depending on where you live. Anyway, I'm not going there. There are seat-like ledges in showers now that I'm sure aren't just there to put shampoo on. I'm also sure more than one park bench has been used for more than sitting. Bleachers. I...

[caption id="attachment_11040" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] In Iaido, we do a lot of katas from a seated position. Why? I think my sensei said a lot of our art is based on the what-if-you're-just-sitting-there-and-someone-decides-to-attack-you idea. Maybe you're visiting someone you think is a good friend and during tea they try to off you. It's not really that far-fetched. One can know someone for years and discover they're vastly different than they seemed. Many people thought Ted Bundy was a fine gentleman. Many of the seated kata start and end while seated and may have some standing parts. In setei, there is Mae, Ushiro, Uke Nagashi, and Tsuke-Ate from seated. Four of the twelve are seated. In the Omori-Ryu set there is Mae, Migi, Hidari, Ushiro, Yae Gake, Uke Nagashi, Kaeshaku, Tsuke Komi, Tsuki Kage, and Nuki Uchi. There is only Oi Kaze in that set that is performed while standing. In the Eish...

I've had far too many of the people that are supposed to help me tell me to sit and wait. Not on everything, but on the things that would actually get me employed sooner rather than waiting for months. Sitting around collecting a cheque that doesn't cover half of your expenses isn't how to get back to a place of prosperity or ensure you don't become homeless. It takes real action. So while waiting for the possibility that some company may eventually call me for an interview, I'm done sitting around in the interim. I've signed up for some flexible work doing deliveries. I'm done listening to fear-mongering about self-employment. Now I'm waiting to be approved to start. And while that is happening, I've been creating myself a schedule that includes blocked off writing time. I edited two chapters today. Tomorrow I meet with my job coach and Wednesday I meet with a recruiter who searched me out online because of my writing accomplishments. I'm also t...