Rae Roy

This week's theme is "Trees." Trees are often in competition for resources. The taller trees get more sunlight and they are the first to make contact with the rain that helps nourish them. Animals seek shelter beneath their boughs. A more runty tree that has unfortunately found itself planted underneath it is unlikely to thrive. But lightning will strike that big tall tree first and potentially kill it. I had an epiphany this weekend after chatting with some friends. I've been feeling rather scattered as I applied to any job that I could possibly do. It's made it quite difficult for me on the resume front. I decided to sit down and think about what I'd really like to do and I'm now pursuing one path more than others. This path will make use of all my skills, pay my bills, and allow me a reasonable amount of work-life balance that won't leave me so exhausted by the evenings and weekends that I won't be able to pursue my writing projects and my inter

[caption id="attachment_10523" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] Often, the most gentle of touches can be the most titillating. Of course, it depends on what one likes. Sensations can be heightened in a few ways, so delicate touches are more engaging. Ice, hot wax, and spanking are some of the ways people make this happen. It turns out that pain and pleasure are not completely different in the brain. That's old news to some and unknown to others. They overlap. For some, that overlap may be greater. Now some of you might be conflicted about this whole idea. It's bad to hurt others. Well, this is a grey area. If they want to be spanked, there's a big difference between beating them and doing it in an enjoyable way. Some of it is figuring out what they like and where pain stops being fun for them. As a general guideline, when spanking, smack their bottom until it stings a bit. Then run that feather you might h

[caption id="attachment_11040" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] What I find hilarious about some people is their certainty that they are in the right about something they have little to no experience with. These are the same people that spend much of their time judging others' ability and life experience based on superficial things like age. The warrior knows better. The warrior knows that even the most gentle person may carry within the ferocity of a tiger. A tiger knows they can disturb you enough with nary a look that strikes to your delicate core while they walk away. They'll go achieve something important while you're left wondering if they're stupid. One may think they've won though they weren't even playing the game. Musashi and the Oar reminds us that delicacy often goes much further than force. This is another thing reinforced when practicing the life-giving sword. Fragile egos are some

For the record, Tuesday is the other day I'm thinking about scrapping. It would give me the time I need for other things and I also often don't feel like writing a blog post on Tuesdays. That all being said, I figured that today I could talk about writing about delicate subjects. Now, I've done this a number of times. One of the writing gigs I got was because I could write about such things as palliative care with the right level of delicacy. This is something I have learned because of my past social work education. And it transferred well to handling a sensitive topic for my play Crisis . That's not to say I always get the tone right. Tone is so very complicated because it's not just about the situation, but the specific character in the situation. For example, when writing about a death in the family there can be a wide range of ways someone might respond depending on their relationship to the deceased, what is going on in their life at the time, and a myriad of o

First, an announcement. I'm excited! I woke up this morning with an epiphany. Last night, I realized that when I'm employed again, I won't have as much time for this blog. I also thought that it was silly to wait until my life is more chaotic when I could use the time now for my writing projects. I've been struggling with this for awhile now and wondering what to do about it. I hope you won't be sad, but Thursday's posts are being retired. Why Thursday? Because going forward, instead of one day a week where I talk about thoughtfulness and gratitude, I want to infuse it in every post I do. I want this blog to be a place of positivity. Not so much positivity that it is unbalanced and hiding from reality, but a place where that underlying vibe is throughout every post. An atmosphere of gratitude. There may be another change later on when I figure some other things out that are rolling about in my brain. On to today's post. In order to weather storms, one mu

[caption id="attachment_10523" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] All right readers. I don't know if you've been excitedly anticipating this one, but here goes. There are a few ways to use teeth in the bedroom. For some people, a bite in just the right spot can be a mega turn on. Wondering where? Shoulders, bums, and the nape of the neck. Given that nipple clamps are a thing for some, there might be a gentle way to nip, but I'd be careful with that one. This should go without saying, but just in case, never use teeth during oral sex unless your partner asks for it. If you're wondering about braces in the bedroom, check this link out. There's also a couple of fetishes involving teeth. Seriously, some people love looking at teeth THAT much. I can't help but wonder if they're dentists... And, um, there's also toothless oral... In Canada, we're heading into a long weekend known as May 2-4

I haven't made use of it yet as I discovered it only this week, but there are free dental screenings in Ottawa for people who have a low income. I'm not sure what happens at these things, but I imagine they're rather like the once or twice yearly visits we had in grade school from the health unit where they checked our teeth. Anyway, I thought I'd mention that in case anyone is in need. There is a schedule with the locations listed and I'm guessing it's hard to get there early enough to get seen, but I'll check it out soon. I've been using dental products that are supposed to repair and whiten. I'm unsure they are working, but I figured they were worth a try. Also, I hear if you add activated charcoal to your toothbrush before the toothpaste, it helps whiten too. It makes a hell of a mess, but I tried it. I think it might take a while to whiten, but my teeth are definitely cleaner, so I think it really does help with plaque. Activated charcoal is als

[caption id="attachment_11040" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] I was briefly thinking about the gruesome side that I could've went with in writing this post. Given that I write some horror, it could've been pretty gory. Instead, I decided to talk about mouth guards. Surprisingly, I haven't seen their use in any of the martial arts I've practiced including karate and jiu-jitsu and they probably should be. Now, usually in sport martial arts there are rules against punching in the head, but it really only takes a fall to smash one's face into the mat and mess up one's smile. Tooth repair is expensive and there are better badges of honour to achieve. In roller derby we always wore them. The first one I had was a cheap one from a department store that is boiled. The protection level was good, but I couldn't talk or drink water with it in. Let's face it, during a game, communication can make

Synopsis: A young woman who grows up near a nuclear power plant develops teeth in an unusual place. Yes, it's the place you think it is. Because of her unusual situation, she's a natural-born student abstinence educator in her school. Okay, that's my take on it. Here is the one from IMDB: "Still a stranger to her own body, a high school student discovers she has a physical advantage when she becomes the object of male violence." Writing: The plot is based on real urban legends that the Hindu, the Ainu, the Shinto, and the Maori tell. They all have their own take, but in this film it's basically a toothed vagina that only the bravest hero can conquer with his penis. The idea is silly, yet the movie is a serious horror that knows it is a bit ridiculous. The writer got the tone right. We see Dawn reacting in silly ways that are completely believable for a teen girl who has to take an unusual path to womanhood. It's also well-paced. I never felt bored or so

This week's theme is... Teeth. I know it's weird, but it's what I pulled out of the "hat." So goals related to teeth... My goal for my teeth is to have them not fall out of my face. Someday I hope to have the money to make them look nicer. I make less saliva than other people, so I do struggle a bit with my teeth. I've had to reduce my sugar intake a lot over the years. I mostly drink water and drink my juice watered down. My teeth have been fully sunk into job hunting lately. I know that's a stretch for connecting teeth to jobs, but maybe having nice teeth helps one get a job? On the job front, I had a skills test and am waiting to hear on a potential interview if I passed the skills test. I've applied to at least as many jobs as there are teeth in my mouth. I have all but my wisdom teeth, so that's more than a few. Just as teething is painful, yet temporary, so too will this stage in my life be. There are many articles online that talk about te

I just wanted to take a moment to say Happy Mother's Day to all those who are moms, will be moms, and were supposed to be moms. To those who have poor relationships with your mothers, I hope you can improve them. If not, maybe you can be the kind of mother you always wanted. To those moms to be, I've heard all the pain, nausea, and worry is worth it. I've even heard the sleepless nights are worth it too. And even the moments where they seem more like monsters than humans. To those who have lost a child, nothing can heal that pain. Know that you're not alone and this day can be whatever you need it to be. I usually spend it either distracted with an event like Comiccon or with close friends. To those who have lost their mothers, I don't know what you're going through. I think that if your mom was anything like mine she would want you to be doing something that makes you happy and healthy. Make this day whatever makes sense to you for whatever you need right now.

There are many ways to enjoy music whether you have any talent or not. You can watch a musical or concert on TV . Whether it's on Netflix or live, they can be a really fun way to change things up. You can be part of a musical . Okay, this might not be an option for everyone. I was fortunate that my high school was part of a school board where they ran a summer theatre program that performed musicals and I got to be part of Jesus Christ Superstar, Grease, and the North American debut of Children of Eden . Attend a rock concert or music festival . This can be a lot of fun. Sometimes there are people who over celebrate though as alcohol is often widely available. Also, sometimes the weather can be unpredictable, so you might want some rain gear. Go to an orchestra performance . There are a wide range of orchestra options, so don't think you just have the super fancy $100 and up ticket option only. Many smaller orchestras charge around $20 for their tickets. One of my favo

[caption id="attachment_10523" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] Frisky Friday has arrived and today's number is 4. In honour of Comiccon arriving in Ottawa, I decided they should have a geeky twist. Browncoats Burlesque is a burlesque group in Ottawa known for its geek culture. You know those humpback creatures from The Dark Crystal? Yeah, one of the performers makes THAT sexy! Funny story? Had I not stumbled onto Browncoats, I may never have found roller derby. It was after Comiccon in May 2013 that I saw an ad about a Comiccon related show. I didn't know a thing about burlesque, so I had a rather eye-opening experience. While there, I met my first friend in Ottawa whose sister happened to be a derby girl. I remember myself repeating, "There's roller derby in Ottawa?" I had seen Whip It and wanted to try it. Bliss was rather tiny like me after all. Anyway, going to that show led me to roller d

Ottawa Comiccon starts tomorrow and for the first time since moving here in 2013, I'm not going to be there. I want to be, but I simply can't afford it. Which sucks because so many of my friends will be there. Most will be running booths and too busy to spend time with anyway though. Today's number is 12, so here is a list of 12 things I'm grateful for despite that my life is a lot harder than I'd like right now. Shelter. Food. A car. Musical instruments. Friends. Family The Internet. Books. Chocolate. Skates. Sunny days. Martial arts. I guess I'm not so poor after all. As an extra bonus, I'm glad I'm not tied to a bed with the only human nearby dead and a stray dog eating them then hallucinating a conversation with a dead guy a la Gerald's Game. Instead of Comiccon, I'm meeting a friend for gelato :) Who knows? Maybe doing something different this weekend will turn out to be the best thing I've done in a long time. R~

[caption id="attachment_11040" align="alignnone" width="1020"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] It's Warrior Wednesday and today's number is 9. Today I'm doing a brief profile on several of the world's best female martial artists. *Please note that I don't own any of the photos.* 1. Iaido - Atsumi Hatakenaka [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="500"] Photo from the 2016 Canadian National Iaido Championships.[/caption] Of course I had to start with my main art. When talking about Iaido, it's Atsumi Hatakenaka for me. She is an amazing woman to look up to. Not only is she skilled, but she once told me she hopes to bring peace to the world through Iaido. Hatakenaka Sensei is an eighth level black belt. She cross trains with hot yoga. Unfortunately, I couldn't find a video of Hatakenaka Sensei. [caption id="" align="alignnone" width="662"] Photo from Centro Méxic

Today's number is 5, which is perfect because I've been wanting to write this post anyway. At the beginning of the school year, my teacher had us list our five favourite films. It felt cruel to pick only five and I had a very hard time with it. What did I pick? Well, I tried to go with a mix of the films that impressed me the most and the ones that I've watched time and again. Here they are: 1. Feds 2. The Godfather 3. Gremlins 4. Dead Poet's Society 5. Edward Scissorhands But it's not enough, so I've been wanting to do a new list of five per genre ever since. This exercise has taught me that there are so many movies I haven't seen yet! Based on what I have seen, here they are in no particular order. Yes, some of them are technically rather awful and cheesy, but I love them anyway. Action/Adventure - The Long Kiss Goodnight - The Seven Samurai - Kill Bill - Mad Max: Fury Road - Pretty much anything Jason Statham is in. Animated - Spirited Away - Team America

Numbers are this week's theme, so I rolled a D20 (20-sided gaming dice) for each day to get a number related to the day. Today's number is 6. Some people undoubtedly read that in their minds as if they were watching Sesame Street. Anyway, so now comes the fun part of figuring out what this number means in relation to my goals. I've decided it's an update on them limited to six categories. 1. Novels I've completed the edit of Chapter 2 and am moving on to Chapter 3 on The Page & The Magician . I've sorted Scion and The Blood Waitress Club into the priority list. 2. Screenplays I have submitted my first feature, Puppy Chow , to two contests and also to a friend for feedback. I couldn't wait for his feedback first because they were May 1st and 3rd deadlines. I received feedback back from the one contest on the first 10 pages. It was mostly positive. They said I can write and that I needed to work on my characterization and pacing to make the tone clearer.

[caption id="attachment_10523" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] It turns out Jung wasn't a huge fan of Freud's ideas about sex. Not that he didn't like them at all, but that they were incomplete being based mainly upon sexuality as repression. He questioned himself about his feelings on Freud's theories because of his own lack of sexual experience. You can read more about that here . Lack of experience is a thing we all think about. As a woman, some men are excited by the idea of you having more experience, but some others are upset by it. I've come across both. There's no way around it though. The probability of all partners being completely on the same page in experience, drive, and adventurousness is extremely low. I've come across some who didn't care either way, but we weren't long-term compatible. I think people can get too worked up about this. Sex is supposed to be fun and wh

[caption id="attachment_11040" align="alignright" width="300"] Image created using Bitmoji[/caption] I know. This post is so very late. But late is better than never, right? All right. So, I found this post on a sensei who uses the Myers-Briggs types to figure out how best to train their students. The test was inspired by Carl Jung's research, so that's pretty interesting. It could be dangerous to guess someone's type and assume things about them because of it though. I wonder how many are drawn to specific types of martial arts based on their types. I'm more drawn to Iaido and Karate because a lot of those are individual study. I'm an INTP aka Logician and Iaido is a mix of theory and has a lot of solitary practice. It also has a large focus on minute details. I know one of my dojo mates is an INTJ. I'm now wondering how many of us have similar personality traits. Maybe there are more ESF types in arts like BJJ where there is mo

Rather than spending a large amount of time writing my own piece, I thought I'd share this one I stumbled onto about Carl Jung and Margaret Tilly. It's also Cinco de Mayo today, so whatever you do, remember to avoid drinking and driving. It may also be Revenge of the Fifth if you celebrated Star Wars Day yesterday. If you just continued partying, you'll get your hangover this evening or tomorrow. And it's the season opener of the newly formed Ottawa Valley Roller Derby tonight at 5:30 PM at Brewer Arena! I'm excited about this as I no longer have to choose which games to go see :) Enjoy yourself and be safe. R~

Carl Jung said a few things about gratitude when he was alive that really speak to me. One of the more poignant in my life right now is, "Be grateful for your difficulties and challenges, for they hold blessings. In fact... Man needs difficulties; they are necessary for health personal growth, individuation and self-actualisation." It has been feeling difficult lately and it has partly been because I've been a bit disorganized. That's not usually me. A few months back, I decided to separate my home task list from my writing and work task list. I thought it was a fantastic idea to be MORE organized. It turns out, I prefer to see everything in one list. It's easier for me to deal with it all in one convenient place. Not that it was inconvenient as I use KanbanFlow and it's easy enough to switch between lists, but I can prioritize it all better in one rather than flipping between them. Anyway, hopefully this period of challenge is leading to something amazing. Ri

Sorry, I'm late on this post because my neck was super sore yesterday and I mostly got movies watched because of it. Anyway, Jung totally relates to theatre. Carl Jung came up with four archetypes. One of these is The Persona. Basically, the persona is the masks we all wear around different people. Now, some people act exactly the same around everyone they know, but most don't. I know people that can't sneeze around people they don't know well. I know tons of women that have shy bladders in public restrooms. I know I used to pretend I didn't like horror as much as I do. I totally act different with my five year old buddy than I do with someone on a date than I do around my martial arts pals than I do with my brothers, etc. That's normal and mostly reasonable. This picture describes this a little better. Actually, this one is even better. So we're all actors most of the days of our lives. It's part of the reason coming home from work is such a relief. You