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On Clothing

Some people wonder why LGBTQ+ folks change the way they dress after coming out. Part of it is because we still don't feel fully like ourselves. It's like we can't truly express who we are in the wrong clothing. It's that old saying, "The clothing makes the man." I'm personally rejecting most feminine clothing these days for many reasons. 1. Who I am. I lean towards the masculine side of life. I was always a bit sporty prior to high school and after university. In high school, I was a tomboy goth. When I first started working office jobs, I loved wearing blazers or vests and dress pants. Now, I'm somewhere around a futch. What's that mean aesthetically? Think blazers, turtlenecks, Henley shirts, skate shoes, t-shirts, jeans, cargos, hoodies, and dress shoes. But I don't mind adding in some girlish elements here and there like earrings, a pixie haircut, and dark nail polish. This all lets me play with gender in my outfits. 2. Durability and susta
Recent posts

International Women's Day 2023

Image by Bianca Van Dijk from Pixabay. I had my first day back at work on Tuesday. It was nice seeing my national lead. I was surprised that many of the lunch places in my building were still operating. One that was lost, I still don't want food from after three years away from it, so that was a happy change.  At our International Women's Day virtual event yesterday, an upgrade to the Golden Rule was proposed by a speaker. The Platinum Rule Treat others the way they want to be treated. Don't assume they want to be treated like you. Ask them what works for them. I like this, but I also think we need to be careful because some people are overly demanding to an unreasonable level. They tend to demand to see the manager... Learning Another topic came up and that was how certain courses like science and math might be taught in ways that males understand more easily than females. I think all the methods should be available for every student to get what they need in order to lear

Super Massive Condo Reorg - Part 1

The past year has been tough. I was depressed and anxious after losing my mom. As a consequence, my declutter efforts got derailed. I kept trying, but there was little to no progress and I couldn't figure out what to do.  Bedroom It seemed no matter how I set up my bedroom, it just didn't flow. And I would have to move things like sports items into my hall or entrance to access them. Neither of those spaces actually have room, so it was nightmarish.  Just before the holidays, I figured out a new plan. This originally included changing to another bed frame that I already had and moving my bed and dresser near the window instead of the door. The canopy frame took up space I wanted for art and I couldn't stretch out fully without my feet touching the footboard, which annoyed me. Here is the disastrous starting point:  Yes, that was all in one 11' by 20ish' room.  The day after I got back from holidays, I got started. I ha

12 Things That Help Manage My Anxiety

I've been struggling with anxiety for a while now. It got so bad that every reflection startled me. And I wondered why we need floor tiles that are so shiny the store fronts can be seen in them!  Some things that have helped include: 1. Turning off message notifications on Facebook. I use a number of alarms and notifications throughout the day as part of my time management strategy and I was having too many distracting ones drown out the more critical ones. When they're all the same level of importance, they become overwhelming and meaningless. I learned that I could turn off notification dots only if I had notifications left on. I was really happy to learn this for messenger as I check multiple times a day anyway and I really don't need to check my business page that often. The links between Instagram and Facebook don't update correctly, so it was constantly putting up notification dots and there was nothing to action. I've learned there is such a thing as being to

Boundaries and Lived Experience - A Rant

This is a rant about people. The kind of people who think it's OK to put forth their worldview or their experience as THE ONE TRUE WAY OF LIVING. These are the people who continue to push against boundaries and can't see that they could be wrong. I'll often see these situations on social media. A page for something specific like neurodiversity, homosexuality, chronic illness, or anything really will attract someone who decides they alone hold the secrets of the universe and you should feel special that they want to impart their wisdom onto you. I'm not going to delve into the gender and race of these knights in tinfoil helmets who live in a fantasy realm of their own making. You can probably easily guess. It's not always that particular segment of society, but it is more often that segment. One of the pages on neurodiversity had this happen recently. They posted about being tired and someone decided that they just need to exercise more. Exercise is great and helpful

DIY Monitor Stand

On the 18th, I was up early and ready to go shopping at 7:00 AM for the items I needed to get several things done, but my nose decided that bleeding was going to be a thing. To be fair, I had woken up with a bloody nose, but I thought it had stopped until I was almost done clearing my car off and my nose seemed to start back up. Despite no tissues in my car, I luckily made it through the scraping of the windshield, but I'm sure any neighbours who were up likely thought it was odd that I warmed it up and cleaned it off only to turn it off and go back inside. The offending nostril was all blocked up after and I didn't know if I could trust it while shopping, but I had things to do, so I grabbed tissues and headed back out! Unfortunately, this nosebleed thing happens quite often with Sjögren's Syndrome . Especially in winter with the dry heat from the electric baseboard heaters that are in my condo building. I miss gas heat. It didn't dry me out as much. A cheap way to hel

Update - Week of February 13-19

Normally, I repost my post on Superb Owl on Superbowl Sunday. I was busy curling and then it was Dino Sunday. Friends of Danielle Allard gather together virtually on Sundays after her usual stream and we play games or watch movies on Discord. It's something I look forward to every week as it's a time to fit in some relaxation and her community is lovely. Lately, I've been quite busy. I've made some key progress in my declutter. The more I get done with that, the more my mind can focus on my creative projects. I've figured out what I need to do in order to fix Sparker and truly get it ready to query potential publishers. I have a lot of work ahead on Sparker , but now I know what I was too stressed out to think about before. The declutter will hopefully be complete in time for a friend's visit in March. Last week I went to a speed dating event hosted by Ding Dong Dating and I had a really good time. Later this week, I'm meeting up with one of the women for